truths.

My days are different every day even with the same schedule.  Thoughts are a million a minute and prayers are accumulating by the second, as I see more of the hearts of those around me, as I learn of the depths of need around the world. One day, we had intercession for poverty stricken families, we were focusing in on Ensenada but there was a statistic: 925 million children died in 2010 alone because of hunger. No one knows that, no one cares about that. Questions came up in my heart - Do I go? Where do I go? I want to be apart of the solution but how? I want to be more than a donation, I want to invest, I want to love, I want to teach them what following this Jesus guy means and that His intentions weren't for their brothers and sisters to starve to death. If I go to college, I would graduate in 2016 - how many seeds could have been sowed, how many hearts could have been restored? But I know it's not that easy and it's not about the location; I'm passionate about going but I'm more passionate about God's will, which I'm not entirely sure is now, today, in this second. That's when I take a deep breath and say, 'I trust you.' That's when I get on my knees and stand in the gap for those families. That's when I learn it's not about me going, it's about Him sending and calling.

Last night, the DTS students performed a skit of the city of Ephesus (when the letter 'Ephesians' was written); there were prostitutes and gypsies. There was a pouring of (fake) blood of a bull on over someone's head. There was a sacrifice of a virgin. There was a god to bow down to, and this was AFTER Jesus came. When we were done, we had a worshiped.
Worthy is the Lamb.
Worthy is the Lamb.
Worthy.
Is.
The.
Lamb.
He didn't die on that cross because He was a criminal. He didn't die because He couldn't defend Himself or wasn't powerful enough. He died because He was worthy enough to take our places, to stand in our gaps; that even when we spit in His face, He choose to say 'I love you.' and He wasn't resurrected because that's a good story. He wasn't resurrected because He didn't die in the first place. He was resurrected so that we may have the same power in Him to conquer our lives, our self, our hopes and choose His. His sacrifice became real, it became intimate and
the puffiness of my eyes are evidence of the tears He stored up for me last night.

God, I love you. God, I want you. God, I see no other but You.
let my scales fall so i may see the glory of the kingdom,
and how this small life fits into it.